As a survivor of emotional abuse, I believe it is one of the hardest type of abuse to recognize. The reason I say this is because I always said “he never hit me” and it’s not that bad. If only I could be a better wife or change myself somehow. Other women have it worse than me. What I have learned, is that it took a huge toll on my mental health, self-esteem, and overall well-being. As I set out on my own as a single mom I felt so alone. I hid in my apartment and avoided people. This is why it’s so common we often struggle to recover and move forward. If you are a single mom who is a survivor of emotional abuse, know that you are not alone. There are things you can do to help heal and move forward. Let’s talk about four steps that can help you heal and move forward from emotional abuse.

Acknowledge What Happened

This was the toughest step for me. Acknowledging the word “abuse” as a professional woman, this brought me to my knees in tears. I am here to say, it’s ok to feel those feelings. Please realize this is only a season of life and it won’t last forever. It will get better. This is just what is happening right now. However, please know that denying or minimizing the abuse, like I did only prolongs the healing process. Accept that what you endured was emotional abuse, and know that you are not to blame. It is not your fault. Once you recognize what happened, you can start working through the trauma and begin to heal.

“You can’t heal what you don’t acknowledge”. – Jack Canfield

Establish a Support System

Establishing a support system is essential in finding healing. I created a private Facebook group to support you in your healing journey called: Single Moms: Thriving after unhealthy relationships. As a survivor myself, I want you to have emotional support and encouragement. My passion is to help you not only heal but THRIVE after enduring emotional abuse. My goal is to help you feel less alone. Joining the group can also be beneficial as you connect with others who have gone through similar experiences. Please be sure you are safe on Facebook.😊

Practice Self-care

Practicing self-care is so important for your well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Some of my favorites are walking my dog, taking a warm bath with Epsom salts and essential oils, yoga (Yoga with Adriene is my favorite!), reading an inspirational book, or taking a walk-in nature. It’s also important to eat nutritious foods, sleep well, and prioritize your physical and mental health by exercising regularly. The 11 Day Jumpstart is an amazing program that helps me on a daily basis.

Set Boundaries

Setting clear boundaries is necessary to protect yourself from emotional abuse. This was difficult for me at first. Once you get in the habit, it gets easier. Check out the Book written by Melissa Urban, The Book of Boundaries. I think it’s a great book! It’s a game changer when you let others know that you won’t tolerate being treated a certain way and more important how you want to be treated. Some people may react strongly in a negative way when you put up a boundary. Please know it’s just because they don’t want you to gain the strength to stand up for yourself. In addition, they want to be able to control you. It may also require you to distance yourself from people who do not respect your limits.

One last thing

Healing from emotional abuse is a process, but taking these steps can help you move forward. Acknowledge what happened, establish a support system, practice self-care, and set boundaries. Remember, healing from abuse takes time, but with self-love and patience, you can recover and live a fulfilling life like I do now. You are not alone, and keep the hope for a brighter tomorrow.😊

💜Renee